Jade
I have not written on this thing for a really long time. I think that my last post probably said that too. Sometimes life just takes up all the time you would normally have to blog, tweet, fb status update or whatever it might be. I can definitely say that I havent had the energy in my to write much of anything, my physical journal has been blank for the most of this year too. Which is really sad for someone like me who has a terrible memory. If I don’t write the bulk of things that happen in my daily life down, I will just forget them as if it never happened. James and I could not even remember what we did for our 1 year anniversary earlier this year. Haha, oh man we are quite a pair.
I want to start writing again more, who knows if that will actually happen but god knows I need some sort of release - I need somewhere to put some of the millions of tiny thoughts that are swimming around in the sea of my head.
This past week I have been to see my dear friend Ashlyn in the hospital several times. Ashlyn is nearly 20 years old and has Lyme’s disease - weird right? I had never heard of anyone having it until her.
So, this past year I didn’t really get to see her at all, which made me very sad and all I really knew about this sickness of hers is that it was worsening and that she was not getting better. About 3 1/2 maybe 4 weeks ago Ashlyn had a cardiac arrest and was taken to the hospital and induced into a coma to protect her brain while her body tried to endure the massive blow to its system. I began praying so hard that I would get the opportunity to go visit her and last Saturday morning I got a text from her mother. I was at the hospital the next day.
I can honestly say, that I have never seen someone so sick in my whole life. My dearest little baby sister Ashlyn, the once bouncy, energetic, silly, fun loving, stubborn ( I mean that in such a good way) and happy young girl that was loved so much by everyone around her has been reduced to a tiny, stick-like frail body. Her eyes lay half open, she was in a coma but it was not like what you would think, the movies show us people in a deep sleep. It wasnt like that at all. I approached the bed and placed my face really close to hers. My eyes in front of hers staring intently and searching for the girl I knew. “Ashlyn can smile and she can cry” said her Mother Kelly (this woman is a saint by the way). A small tear broke from her left eye and fell slowly down her cheek. I will never forget that moment for the rest of my life. If I had to give away every memory of everything I have ever experience and only keep one - that would be the one I would keep. Words fail to describe the privilege and love I felt in that moment.
I have been gathering as many spare moments as possible these past few weeks - to step away from whatever is going on at the moment and do some more research on Lyme. It’s a very complicated thing, and its difficult to wrap your brain around how such a small being can carry such a lethal disease. My heart aches, I just want to do something.
This is Ashlyn, a few years before she got sick. Please keep her in your prayers.
